This Floating Poo Was Way Too Symbolic! These Are the Television Letdowns of the Year.

As we consider the TV landscape of the past year, a handful of shows emerge not for their excellence, but for their notable failures. Ranging from awkward spin-offs to confusingly bad docuseries, here are the productions that had us utterly bewildered or simply reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

Where to begin with this love/hate follow-up? Burdened with dreadful scripts, cringe-inducing character development (we demand better for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the show struggled to justify its existence. Briefly, as the third series began, it looked like it had at last found its groove. Then arrived an episode centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. Little surprise the showrunner declared this would be the last series. It concluded on a low point; the closeup of Miranda’s loo full of poo was just way too on-the-nose. Yet, fans undeniably found joy dissecting every single “what on earth?” moment. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – twirled around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who didn’t release a small sob?

The Kim Kardashian Drama

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? Of course she can’t.’

But that was practically the smallest of this show's issues. The recipient of a very rare no-star review, it was hard to know where to begin enumerating the flaws. The laughably leaden dialogue? The tedious veneration of affluence and materialism? The almost wilful procession of cliches? Performances so bad they felt almost malicious? Suffice it to say “each and every one” and never speak of this series again. Except, a new season has been commissioned, so we’re probably going to have to.

The Charlie Sheen Documentary

Considering the restraining orders, abuse allegations and fatherly failures, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a troubled figure. Not you’d truly have gleaned it from this three-part documentary which chuckled along at Sheen’s various episodes of reckless excess while failing to tell us anything we didn’t already know. Instead, it felt as if this volatile personality was being pandered to, so any sympathy this series might evoke should be saved for the people who have had to endure close contact with this charming but flippant egotist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Of course we knew it was ridiculous from the get-go: a thriller about a supercomputer known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either save the world – or destroy all of humanity. We persevered out of sheer admiration for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had given up trying. One barely reacted when his character died, and the other ultimately hacking Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. Talk about admitting defeat.

MobLand

Dodgy figures convening in empty boxing gyms? A certain band's Firestarter jackhammering away in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its gangland drama back.

In truth, that is unfair on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many look a little dated now, but at least they didn’t endure the ignominy of having to indulge unconvincing accents. But there were plenty of other problems. Primarily that it was just profoundly dull; a conflict over narcotics territory between various cockney picaresques which seemed a bit basic.

The Meghan Markle Series

Considering the degree to which she provokes the ire of certain performatively angry commentators, it’s almost easy to applaud the Duchess of Sussex’s televised forays into quaint homemaking as deliberate statements. But then you view them and are forced to concede that in this case, they may have a point. It’s like watching a lifestyle magazine come to life; a meme for evening drinks with ideas of grandeur; a procession of snoozing dogs, buzzing beehives, Hallmark sayings and pointless crafting “tips” you’ll not remember instantly. All underpinned by vast, largely undeserved wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are obviously fascinating things to be discussed about regarding Victoria Beckham and her struggles with career, self-image, self-worth. But for some reason, this three-part series chose not to explore them. Instead, the viewing was like consuming a marketing catalogue. She obviously has every right to bridle at what she describes as her “stern” image. But sadly, she didn’t do herself any favours with this cagey letdown of a series.

The Inheritance

It should have been the next cultural phenomenon – except even camper, with a famous star as a deceased benefactor and a well-known personality managing her estate. What more could you ask for? As players competed, there was plenty of backstabbing and arguing. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s still too complicated to explain what exactly was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw glimpses of the star via prerecorded videos. The series ended up smelling of a production that was trying way too hard to emulate something far greater than it.

Too Much

How does one succeed a show that defined a generation? The pressure was enormous for this glitzy romantic comedy about Jessica, a rosy-eyed New Yorker who lands in London with a broken heart. The star took her biggest role by the horns and was joyous to watch, reveling in Austen levels of romantic notions. But it was all very slick and, paradoxically, was insufficient. Plus, the abundance of celebrity cameos involved felt icky.

The Sketch Show Return

Not even good enough to be ‘uneven’.

Given the shrewd recruitment of talented emerging comics, hopes were high. But sadly, most of it fell flat. A recurring sketch was a one-note joke milked to a husk but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too willing to slip into a familiar ranting mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, in contrast, simply provoked the idea that they should probably have stayed in there a while longer.

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox

This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was overseen by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively showcased the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there undoubtedly is an interesting drama to be made about the tragic 2007 murder, this was not it. The material needed to be treated sensitively. Rather, the series struggled painfully to find the right tone, lurching from strangely jaunty, somewhat mannered farce to inevitably, real-life horror. Twisted? Arguably. A complete mess? Very much so.

Prime Target

We admire the star … but did we believe him playing the most brilliant maths genius in history, a man so intelligent he’s on the brink of a discovery that could ruin society? No! This international thriller about secret services spying on – and killing off – intellectuals frankly got more farcical by the second. Silliness-by-numbers.

1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story

This hagiography followed the online personality notorious for explicit escapades as she prepared for her biggest feat yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we wanted was way more examination of her true psyche, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have interviewed the legendary mum who showed up to haul her son out of the queue. What we got was disturbing shots and zero interrogation of her infamy whatsoever. And to think, the filmmaker has a teenage daughter too.